Stupid News

Results for “assault”

Sep 16, 2024

Assault With A Water Gun

Good thing it wasn’t water balloons, she’d be in solitary. More on the absurd aqua assault charge HERE. Photo by Yasin Arıbuğa on Unsplash

Jul 9, 2024

Punks Throw Cheese at Car

The most Wisconsin crime EVER! More on this un-brie-lievable assault HERE! Photo by Önder Örtel on Unsplash

May 17, 2024

Assault with Dirty Diaper

It’s not as bad as Cain and Abel, but it’s close. More on this going concern HERE! Damian Kasten mugshot (via Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office)

May 14, 2024

Man Assaults Cops With Cheese

It has to be at least a Class BRIE felony. More on how this blockhead tried to slice the cops HERE! Photo by Aliona Gumeniuk on Unsplash

Nov 27, 2023

Man Busted for Assault With Oreos

Let’s all just be glad they weren’t Double Stuff Oreos. Read more about how the cookie crumbled HERE! Photo by Brad Switzer on Unsplash

Sep 7, 2023

Florida Man Busted For Assault With A Snickers Bar

He should have eaten the candy bar first, because you are not yourself when you’re hangry. The dangerously delectable details HERE! Photo by Shyam Mishra on Unsplash

Sep 1, 2023

Man Arrested for Assault with a Lollipop

What a Dum-Dum. Find out how many licks it takes to get to the center of the story HERE! Photo by Brecht Deboosere on Unsplash

Aug 16, 2023

Autocorrect Leads to Police Raid, Assault

This is a perfect example of why you ALWAYS check your spelling. Read every stinking detail HERE! Photo by DuoNguyen on Unsplash

Jun 29, 2023

A felonious waste of perfectly good Skittles.

A Minnesota malefactor arrested for assault with Skittles. Somebody remind this fool it’s “taste the rainbow,” not “TOSS the rainbow!” Read the candy-coated story here.