Couple Cuffed After Frying Pan Fight

So apparently in LaPorte, Pennsylvania, love really is a battlefield — and the weapons of choice were frying pans. Police say Paula and Maynard Folmar got into an argument that went full Food Network, except instead of cooking dinner, they started clobbering each other.

According to the report, Paula pushed Maynard into a cabinet and whacked him with a frying pan. Multiple times. Maynard then grabbed his own pan — because apparently this kitchen’s well-stocked — and hit her right back. Then came a punch, then a bite, and probably a very confused police officer writing it all down.

Both of them ended up with matching injuries and matching charges — simple assault and harassment. No word yet on whether the pans survived, but one did have a pretty good dent.