Stupid News
Results for “cocaine”
Aug 5, 2026
Toupée Turns Into Trafficking Trouble
A gentleman flying from Bogota, Columbia to Barcelona, Spain decided the best way to smuggle about thirty‑four grand worth of cocaine was… under a toupee. Not in a suitcase, not in a secret compartment. Just taped to his head, topped off with the world’s most suspicious wig. Security notices this guy looking nervous, and his … Continue reading Toupée Turns Into Trafficking Trouble
Jul 3, 2026
Booger Sugar Baggie Butt Blunder
A Florida woman gets pulled over last weekend. Sunrise Saturday morning, weaving a little, allegedly not super cooperative. Ends up getting arrested after resisting a deputy and heads off to jail. Now comes intake, where they run her through one of those scanners that basically says, “Hey… something’s not quite right here.” Specifically, her “lower … Continue reading Booger Sugar Baggie Butt Blunder
May 21, 2026
Cops Bust Dude Smuggling Cocaine In Kim Kardashian Underwear
So… somewhere out there, there’s a truck driver who really misunderstood what “body shaping” means. A British guy just got 13-and-a-half years after trying to smuggle about $9 million worth of cocaine… inside a shipment of Kim Kardashian’s Skims underwear. Yep. Nothing says “support and lift” like 198 pounds of illegal booger sugar. Authorities say … Continue reading Cops Bust Dude Smuggling Cocaine In Kim Kardashian Underwear
Apr 29, 2026
Fish Frenzy: Salmon on Something
You’ve heard of cocaine bears, maybe even those wired sharks… but now? Cocaine salmon. Researchers found traces of cocaine getting into rivers and lakes—basically making their way from us… to them. And once it hits the salmon, things get weird. The fish start swimming farther, acting bolder, eating differently—basically like they’ve got somewhere to be … Continue reading Fish Frenzy: Salmon on Something
Apr 1, 2026
Drunken Airport Debacle
In Daytona Beach Airport in Florida, Bryan Parker apparently decided TSA lines were for amateurs. He plowed his blue Mustang straight through the airport gate and right onto the runway. And because this is Florida, he then tried to hop on a few planes—one even had passengers inside. Thankfully, it was locked. Cops finally nabbed … Continue reading Drunken Airport Debacle
Mar 25, 2026
Caribbean Cocaine Sharks
So apparently, sharks off the coast of the Bahamas are now swimming around wired and maybe a little… *too* happy. A new study tested 85 sharks near Eleuthera Island and found nearly a third with traces of caffeine, painkillers, and even cocaine in their blood. Scientists say it’s the first time caffeine and acetaminophen have … Continue reading Caribbean Cocaine Sharks
Jan 27, 2026
Assault With A Ketchup Pack
Some people just really hate being woken up. It all went down in Florida, a bus terminal, late last Monday night. A guy named Austin Simmons looks totally passed out on a bench. Someone, being decent, goes to check if he’s okay. Big mistake. Austin wakes up furious, grabs a ketchup packet and hurls it … Continue reading Assault With A Ketchup Pack
Oct 31, 2025
Cocaine Found in Trick-or-Treat Candy Bag
Forget full-size candy bars—this grandma found something way stronger. Why you should always check your kids candy haul HERE!
Sep 22, 2025
Match Teacher Busted With Blow
Somebody’s after-school special got way too real. More on her venture into “higher” education HERE!
Mar 4, 2025
Man Caught With Cocaine In Hair
His cocaine coiffure caused customs chaos. The story and unbelievable video HERE! Photo by Lordhair
Jul 23, 2024
Cocaine Sharks!!!
The direct to streaming, D-List celebrity screenplay just writes itself here. The scoop on why south Atlantic sharks are swimming with a bit more… enthusiasm HERE! Photo by Efe Yağız Soysal on Unsplash
Jun 12, 2024
She was Left Holding the Bag. The Very Heavy Bag.
A woman was apprehended at the Chicago Midway International Airport with nearly 62 pounds of cocaine. It would have been half that, but her partner in crime ditched her. Read the story HERE. Photo by Daniel von Appen on Unsplash