Stupid News
Results for “eat”
Feb 6, 2026
Florida Freeze Means Iguana Pizza
So, you know how Florida does winter — one day it’s paradise, next day iguanas are falling out of trees like it’s raining lizards. Well, a restaurant in North Palm Beach decided to turn that weirdness into dinner. Local iguana trapper Ryan Izquierdo scooped up a few of the frozen freeloaders, cleaned them up, and … Continue reading Florida Freeze Means Iguana Pizza
Jan 30, 2026
Man Steals Harp, Jumps In River
In Pittsburgh, PA some guy decides to steal a harp. Not like a tiny one you tuck under your arm—no, a full-size, $30,000 harp. The fancy kind that lives in concert halls. He drags it to the riverbank, strips down, and jumps straight into the river. No explanation, no audience—just him, nature, and one very … Continue reading Man Steals Harp, Jumps In River
Jan 28, 2026
Assault With A Pork Chop
So, you think your family dinners get tense? In Florida, AGAIN, 18-year-old Farrah Kernan got into a fight with her mom and decided to settle it… with a pork chop. Yep. A literal flying piece of meat. Police say Farrah had been drinking, got into an argument, and smacked her mom in the face before … Continue reading Assault With A Pork Chop
Jan 21, 2026
Homeowner Fights Off Burglar With A Frying Pan
At 2:40 in the morning last Friday in Seattle, a 61-year-old homeowner wakes up to find some stranger rummaging through his house. The intruder grabs a kitchen knife, so our homeowner, clearly operating on pure dad instinct, reaches for the next best thing… a frying pan. Yep, cast iron versus kitchen knife. With his 15-year … Continue reading Homeowner Fights Off Burglar With A Frying Pan
Jan 19, 2026
Florida Cop Handcuffs Runaway Emu
Florida, where the weird news never sleeps. A deputy gets a call regarding a runaway emu. Yeah, an emu. Not your usual traffic stop. Bodycam’s rolling, and Cpl. Keisler’s out there like, “Dispatch, I’m in pursuit of… an emu.” The bird’s bolting down the road, Keisler’s trying to keep up, and somewhere in all this … Continue reading Florida Cop Handcuffs Runaway Emu
Jan 14, 2026
Search For Monkeys In St. Louis Hampered by Fake AI Posts
There are monkeys on the loose in St. Louis. They were first spotted hanging around O’Fallon Park last week, just living their best life in “The Lou.” Nobody knows where they came from, but since owning exotic animals is illegal in the city, someone out there is probably sweating right now. The St. Louis Zoo … Continue reading Search For Monkeys In St. Louis Hampered by Fake AI Posts
Jan 13, 2026
Mayor Tells Residents Not To Eat Toilet Seats
So, there’s a mayor in Tasmania who had to post a public reminder that honestly shouldn’t exist: “Please don’t eat toilet seats.” Apparently, Mayor Michelle Dracoulis found bite marks—actual bite marks—on a public toilet seat. And because this is the world we live in, she had to take to social media to say, in all … Continue reading Mayor Tells Residents Not To Eat Toilet Seats
Jan 12, 2026
Future Mermaid Arrested For Skinny Dipping
Down in small-town Louisiana, in peaceful pond, one determined woman was chasing her inner Ariel. Police in Linville, just north of Monroe, showed up to a neighbor’s property after reports of a naked trespasser — turns out, it was Erin Sutton, mid-dip, fully committed to “becoming a mermaid.” Not her first visit, apparently. The pond’s … Continue reading Future Mermaid Arrested For Skinny Dipping
Jan 5, 2026
Man Charged With Au Naturel Robbery of Meat Market
Guess “dressed for success” meant something else to this guy. The naked truth HERE!
Dec 31, 2025
Man Steals Same Car TWICE
Apparently, déjà vu is now a criminal lifestyle choice. The tale of a VERY literal repeat offender HERE!
Dec 29, 2025
Naked Man Terrorizes Hobby Lobby
Florida just can’t take the holiday off. Details about the Florida “craft store chaos” HERE!
Dec 12, 2025
Drone Drops Crab Legs Into Prison
Prison dining just got an upgrade! How inmates ALMOST went from mystery meat to surf and turf HERE! Photo credit: South Carolina Department of Corrections