Stupid News
Aug 25, 2026
Florida Police Seek Smooth Criminal
Florida police are looking for a gas-station robber who may have taken “Smooth Criminal” a little too literally. The guy allegedly walked into a convenience store wearing one white glove, a tan sun hat, a medical mask, a light green shirt, and black pants. So: part Michael Jackson, part retired golfer, part guy who absolutely … Continue reading Florida Police Seek Smooth Criminal
Aug 24, 2026
Vader Voices Support For Flock Cameras
Darth Vader has apparently added “city council activist” to his résumé. A guy in full Vader gear showed up at a San Diego City Council meeting to support controversial Flock license-plate cameras — if you can call it support when the argument is basically, “The Emperor needs this to track rebel scum.” Between the signature … Continue reading Vader Voices Support For Flock Cameras
Aug 21, 2026
Mail Carrier Arrested For Menards Mischief
An Iowa mail carrier apparently took the phrase “save big money at Menards” a little too personally. Authorities say 45-year-old Jill Brown of Ottumwa is accused of swiping Menards rebate forms from people on her mail route, then redeeming them herself. And this wasn’t just one missing envelope—it allegedly went on for about two years. … Continue reading Mail Carrier Arrested For Menards Mischief
Aug 20, 2026
Woman Dies, Revived, Gets Fined
A woman in New Zealand had what you might call a very eventful grocery-store parking experience. She collapsed outside a supermarket in Auckland, and DIED! A stranger stepped in to perform CPR after she had no pulse. Paramedics got her to the hospital, where she recovered. Incredible story. A real-life second chance. Then came the … Continue reading Woman Dies, Revived, Gets Fined
Aug 19, 2026
Florida Man Poop Problem
A Florida neighbor feud went from “please pick up after your dog” to “why is there poop flying through my house?” Police say Trey Decloedt had been arguing with the couple next door over dog mess left around their shared driveway. The disagreement reportedly hit a new low when he allegedly walked into their home … Continue reading Florida Man Poop Problem
Aug 18, 2026
Bank Bandit Kitty Finds New Home
In a Stupid News follow up…the kitten who got dragged into an attempted bank robbery has officially left her life of crime behind. Three-month-old Magnolia, a panda-colored kitten with absolutely no criminal record, despite what the internet may suggest, was snatched from a Pet Supplies Plus in Beltsville, Maryland, on July 13. The guy who … Continue reading Bank Bandit Kitty Finds New Home
Aug 17, 2026
Fisherman Fights Face-Hugging Octopus
This gives new meaning to “separation anxiety.” In a WILD viral video, a Pilipino fisherman had reeled in an octopus, and the little sea Houdini immediately latched onto his face. Jesser Cervantes was on a wooden dinghy when the eight-armed escape artist wrapped itself around his head, covering his mouth and refusing to clock out. He … Continue reading Fisherman Fights Face-Hugging Octopus
Aug 14, 2026
Pilot Pops Positive for Pot
Air India has a new policy that’s basically, “Let’s make sure nobody’s flying high before they fly high.” After a flight from Phuket to Delhi suddenly dropped about 300 feet last week, injuring 17 passengers and crew, the captain tested positive for marijuana. Reports say the captain was standing behind the co-pilot’s seat when the … Continue reading Pilot Pops Positive for Pot
Aug 13, 2026
Player Practices With Snake in Helmet
An Arkansas high school football player learned the hard way that “check your equipment” is more than just coach-speak. The Maumelle High player practiced for about an hour with a two-foot cottonmouth snake hiding under the padding of his helmet. Yes, a cottonmouth. The venomous kind. Not exactly the sort of extra protection you want … Continue reading Player Practices With Snake in Helmet
Aug 12, 2026
Florida Diving Drama Over Lobster
Florida’s lobster season apparently brought out the worst kind of territorial behavior: the kind that involves allegedly cutting off a teenager’s air supply. Authorities say 51-year-old Michael Simpson was upset that another boat had anchored near what he considered his lobster-diving spot off Miami. He reportedly circled the boat, argued with the captain, then made … Continue reading Florida Diving Drama Over Lobster
Aug 11, 2026
Florida Front Porch Gator Guest
In Florida, checking the front porch has become a full-on wildlife documentary. A Palm Bay, Florida family got a late-night motion alert from their garage camera—and found a seven-and-a-half-foot alligator making itself very comfortable right in front of the door. The family watched from the safety of the window as this prehistoric porch pirate crawled … Continue reading Florida Front Porch Gator Guest
Aug 10, 2026
Florida Parking Lot Blade Brawl
Two Florida men allegedly turned a dispute over an ex-girlfriend into a showdown involving a hatchet, a machete, and what I can only assume was a very confused grocery list. Police say Everette Krichbaum was sitting in his car when James Gay approached him. Words were exchanged, Krichbaum allegedly pulled a hatchet, and Gay reportedly … Continue reading Florida Parking Lot Blade Brawl